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“You try it!” Samantha challenges her bewildered beau (Adam) when he bellows that she´s acting like a squeamish princess. “If you´re fine with it, I´ll be fine with it.” Adam initially resists sampling his spooge (“It´s gay!” he whines) , but eventually he chokes down his rancid cum, with an anguished expression on his defeated visage. Although he reports that he´s “fine with it,” we know that he´s lying.

I lied too, 25 years ago, when I gobbled through the same horrible gastronomic gantlet. My lover Robyn perceived my bluff; she forced me to admit that I loathed asian creampie the salty, viscous wad. Ever since then, my glee at getting my lollipop licked has been tainted with advance remorse: My receiver is about to be nauseous.

“Sex and the City” provided me with a glimmer of hope, though, a key to decontaminating the puddles of my prick. When Samantha presents her pungent dilemma at lunch to her female friends, they advise her that “it has something to do with nutrition . there´s something he could eat to make it sweeter.” Her subsequent attempt to detox his dribblings with wheat grass juice and a ginger-melon smoothie proves unsuccessful, but asian creampie I still wondered wistfully: Is a herbal remedy available? Is there a cum-sweetening savior?

Milk products also make cum chunks notoriously nasty because of the “high bacterial putrefaction level,” asserts Sexuality.org. Other edibles that sexperts consistently label as bitter wad wreckers (and that I haven´t already mentioned) are red meat, broccoli, cauliflower, Brussels sprouts, greasy food, spices, coffee and chocolate. Chemically processed liquor creates an extremely acidic taste, but naturally fermented beverages like sake and Rolling Rock or Honey Brown beer give spunk a sugary taste. Tobacco is also guaranteed to gross out one´s goo.

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