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“You try it!” Samantha challenges her bewildered beau (Adam) when he bellows that she´s acting like a squeamish princess. “If you´re fine with it, I´ll be fine with it.” Adam initially resists sampling his spooge (“It´s gay!” he whines) , but eventually he chokes down his rancid cum, with an anguished expression on his defeated visage. Although he reports that he´s “fine with it,” we know that he´s lying.

I lied too, 25 years ago, when I gobbled through the same horrible gastronomic gantlet. My lover Robyn perceived my bluff; she forced me to admit that I loathed asians cum the salty, viscous wad. Ever since then, my glee at getting my lollipop licked has been tainted with advance remorse: My receiver is about to be nauseous.

“Sex and the City” provided me with a glimmer of hope, though, a key to decontaminating the puddles of my prick. When Samantha presents her pungent dilemma at lunch to her female friends, they advise her that “it has something to do with nutrition . there´s something he could eat to make it sweeter.” Her subsequent attempt to detox his dribblings with wheat grass juice and a ginger-melon smoothie proves unsuccessful, but asians cum I still wondered wistfully: Is a herbal remedy available? Is there a cum-sweetening savior?

I began my research by telephoning the busiest cocksucker I know: Trebor Healy, a gay poet who has praised slurping in paeans such as “Dick Prayer,” “The Big Cock Candy Mountain” and “The Star-Spangled Boner.” Trebor informed me that “organic vegetarians taste the best, and those who drink plenty of liquids put out a better consistency; the dehydrated lad can get a bit thick. Also, a man whose mouth tastes good will always have delicious cum, while a foul kiss leads to less-than-fabulous cumshots.”

asians cum Trebor´s report depressed